Face the Music [Vaan]

[Captain Dawn Roseburn]

A harsh buzzing echoed in Dawn’s ears making her groan in pure pain like she had a hang over, but she hadn’t drunk excessively since she was a teenager when the effects of alcohol were still new to her body. Brushing off sleep, her hand reached over the bed to the side table, slamming down on the alarm clock that kept flashing 4:25 AM at her face. The sun wasn’t even up yet, but with the long ride she had back to the palace it was best to get up as early as was possible. Changing out of the towel she had passed out in the night before, her legs were sore from the long horse ride and her wolf wanted to simply curl up in bed to sleep off the mild pain. Shaking her head, she retied the corset tight around her chest before shimming into her pants and boots. Pursing her lips, she make a mental note to stop at her home before going to the palace to get some new clothes. The corset was really starting to hurt, sighing she knew she likely had tied it too tight but there wasn’t time to fix it.

Making a quick glance around the room, Dawn pocketed her cell phone before leaving the guest suite. The hall was deserted, she could hear a few servants just getting up in some rooms down from hers but she hadn’t the time to make pleasant about waiting for them to fully awaken to inform Arawn of her departure. Feeling a little rude about rushing out of Lord Frost’s home after already missing dinner, she grabbed a pen and a piece of paper from a nearby table to scribble a note.

Lord Arawn Frost,
Thank you for the hospitality last evening and I am sorry for skipping out on dinner. I have high hopes that Nathanial will keep you safe, he has never failed me. Forgive me for leaving so early before you or your staff is awake but my services are needed back at the palace ASAP.
Respectfully,
Captain of the Guards Dawn Roseburn

Folding the paper, she slipped the small letter under Arawn’s bedroom door before leaving his lovely home that made hers look like an ant hill. Dawn shut the door behind her as gently as possible, not wanting to disturb the rest of the household. Her boots crushed over the gravel and dirt as her nose took in that scent that only came right before sunrise, as if the sun was yawning to clear away the muck from the day before. Stepping into the stables, she spotted Destiny, wide away and ready to leave the strange stables. Laughing, she saddled the large creature and mounted her. “Let’s go home.” It was a soft spoke whisper but the horse clearly heard it while her fingers ran over Destiny’s neck.

Racing away from the mansion, Dawn’s mind was focused on getting home as soon as possible. As the sun began to rise over the horizon, she was already half way home, clearly the horse had been well taken care of and she would have to send some special thanks to Arawn when she got back to the palace. Knowing Destiny was getting tired, she slowed them down to a steady, smooth walk just before entering the town around seven in the morning. Dismounting, she tied up Destiny at the gate to her house; no one was stupid enough to try to take the horse from her home since her neighbors knew who she was.

Dawn tried to not waste time, she checked her messages on her machine before running upstairs to change out of yesterday’s clothes and take a quick shower. Smelling of sweat and horse wasn’t something she enjoyed. The she-wolf even took the time to dry her hair, knowing it was going to take a good twenty minutes to tame her thick curls. Blinking at the mirror after applying some mascara, she hadn’t even realized what she’d pulled out of the closet to step into before it was too late. It was too late; the clock on her wall told her she’d blown away two hours. Needing to get back to the palace, she would have to suck it up and stick with the outfit her sister had bought her for their birthday. She stopped at her weapons room and placed a few throwing knives under the shorts just out of sight from the world.

Stepping out into the blazing sun, Dawn climbed onto Destiny’s back once again and took off for the palace. It only took ten minutes to arrive at the royal stables where she was forced to hand over the reins of Destiny to a stable helper since she was in a bit of a rush. As she stepped into the main hallway, her nose picked up Vaan’s scent and her wolf instantly awoke once more, panting in her ear to move faster. She slipped passed her fellow guards, taking note of which ones didn’t realize she was there and the handful that did. It was always a pain to have to correct their lack of attention while on duty. But for now, it would wait.

Before she allowed herself to think about it, Dawn knocked on Vaan’s office door having followed his scent right there. “Your Highness, it’s Dawn.” Turning the doorknob, she walked right up to his desk to stop right before it. She could feel her knees shaking as the words from last night echoed in her ears. How could she have been stupid enough to say what she had, even if it was over there phone?! She tried to draw on strength from her wolf, but her sister wolf was already in that lukewarm state where all her eyes were set on Vaan and how she wanted to just curl up at his feet.

[Vaan Niall]

Rays of sunlight peeked through the almost completely shut curtains that hung in his office, alerting the king had it was now tomorrow. Dawn would be here in a matter of moments and his mind raced not knowing what to do and say when she crossed the threshold.

Vaan had not slept a wink, just sat here in this now uncomfortable chair thinking over what she had said before hanging upon him, leaving him completely speechless. The cold shower had washed away his sizable problem but it had not help him get to bed. Even when his eyelids had become heavy, he did not sleep.

Glancing back to his pile of paperwork, it had lessen over the past few hours. Work had helped chase away his worries for but a moment, however it gave him time to think and think deeply. Vaan thought over his feelings for Dawn, thought over what the future could bring if he let it.

Did he love her? His brother wolf growled in his ear, telling him that they did love him, that she was everything to them but had she truly meant those words? Or had it just been anger? Anger at him for his flirtations over the phone to quieten him and get back to how things should be between them?

The familiar scent floated under the door, alerting him of her presence on the other side of the door. It was now or never as fate knocked upon his door asking for entrance. "Come in" He answered, lowering his eyes back down away from the door. Soon enough she had crossed into his territory, standing before his desk like every loyal solider would when reporting to their superior officer.

"First of all, welcome back Captain" This was hard for Vaan, his tone of voice was strong once again, commanding like a King should be. There was no warmth behind those words but he had to be formal with her even if he did not want to. As much he desired to pull her closer and kiss her senseless, it could not be. Vaan was not ruled by his desires.

Relationships like the one he wished for were forbidden for a reason.

[Captain Dawn Roseburn]

Feeling like such a pup all over again, Dawn struggled to keep her legs from wobbling under her weight. Her words the night before vibrated in her mind until her wolf huffed at her as if to say she had nothing to worry about. It had been a long time coming but fear still grew in her chest unsure of what to say to Vaan. Was it ok to ignore her outburst and go on as Captain? There didn’t seem to be any chance she could truly be with Vaan even if they both desired it.

Standing before Vaan, Dawn couldn’t prevent her nose from taking in his scent, nearly crumbling under the storm of emotions that passed through her body from each breath in. She loved him. Luna, there were so many reasons why she did and yet she couldn’t find the voice to even say one simply because of their different ranks in society. Being Captain held many perks, but it couldn’t do a thing for getting the one male she dreamed about late at night. Letting her eyes skim over him, she noted the dark circles under his eyes, a state she hadn’t seen him in since Lady Jane passed away. Had something else transpired since she’d spoke to him over the phone? Her need to defend him rose up until she had to squeeze down on her wolf to keep her at bay instead of allowing her to hunt down whatever had caused the King unrest.

“Thank you, Sire.” Why did it hurt so much that he seemed to be acting like nothing had happened? Because Dawn really cared for Vaan even if it would never be allowed. “There...there were no problems last night.” Her heart was beating too fast as she felt her face blush with color while trying to appear calm while inside she was a nervous wreck. At her sides, her fingers clenched and relaxed over and over, unsure if she should even bother bringing up the topic she had hung up on him for. The one thing that kept bugging her most was Vaan’s lack of attention to her, his vision seemed to be holding steady on the papers on his desk. At that thought her wolf was eager to reach over, tempt him into glancing up but for Dawn such thoughts were best to stay hidden.

“Vaan…” She couldn’t stop herself from saying his name without any formal title nor could she stop how weak her voice came out. Tears swelled at the corners of her eyes before she reached up to brush them away. Vaan was turning her inside out and he didn’t even know it or if he did, he didn’t care. “Last night, I didn’t mean to snap at you. I was tired and I know that’s a terrible excuse for my actions but that’s all I have.” Allowing her legs to finally give out, she kneeled before Vaan’s desk with her head turned down to let her hair shield her face as a few more tears fell down her cheeks. “Forgive me. I spoke out of line and about something that doesn’t matter to you.” A something called love that made her wolf sing every time she saw him and cry every time she wasn’t by his side.

[Vaan Niall]

How the tables had turned. Vaan had never seen his captain like this before, she stood before him almost like a broken woman. Her spirit did not burn as bright, normally it burnt like a thousand suns but not it flicked like a flame that was out to go out. By the time his eyes had risen to meet hers, his world fell apart, his heart shot into his mouth, silencing any words before they could escape.

If he thought he looked a mess, that was an understatement compared to the woman who stood before him. Dawn looked terrible, his brother wolf whined in agony in his ear at the very sight of a sorrow filled captain of his guard. Something had to done and soon. Had he caused this distress to arise within her? Hatred for himself emerged, consuming every inch, every pore of his being. Vaan did not want to be the source of her pain.

A war was waging within the King’s mind, his eyes flashed with anger, not meant for Dawn but himself. This was his fault, he had done this to her. His and her hidden feelings for one another had bubbled beneath the surface and let to this. The volcano had burst, burning the both of them, causing them both pain. He lost sleep, she was still suffering just standing in his very presence. The portrait of his former lover Jane started down at the two of them. If she was still alive, Jane would not be happy with how things had progressed and how he had treated his captain at an arms length.

Hearing her voice stammer, pulled terribly at his heart strings. He could not help but wince, he should have not directed his gaze away from her, he should have looked her when she entered the room. He was going about this the wrong way. How close he to losing everything, he did not desire to know but it felt like a thread was holding this situation together.

A line had indeed been crossed the moment she fell to her knees. Dawn never begged, cried or fought like this, it was going against everything she stood for. There was only one thing left to do. Silently he pushed himself up and out of his chair, rounding his desk to her. The king soon was on his knees beside her, his muscular arms wrapped around her middle, holding her close to him. “There is nothing to forgive” It was all he said before his lips collided with hers, it was a soft, caring kiss trying to express his strong feelings to her.

[Captain Dawn Roseburn]

The anger rolling off Vaan didn’t normally bother Dawn even when she’d been on the receiving end of the alpha male’s anger. Normally, she’d face him as his equal, stare him right back down and give her side of the story to whatever had occurred. But today was different. Today she didn’t feel confident, didn’t feel secure in what she said or did. The captain felt like she was right back at the bottom of the totem pole where she’d begun as a guard in training so long ago. Her wolf whimpered as wave after wave of anger seeped off the King, her wolf wanted comfort, wanted a gentle hand to pet her on the head as if saying everything was ok.

But Dawn wasn’t sure that kind hand was going to come. She had completely overstepped her bounds when she’d spoke so forward with Vaan about her feelings the night before. Her dream of Lady Jane had meant nothing; it hadn’t brought her reassurance if anything she was more terrified she was losing her mind to madness. Hearing the words that King Vaan needed her coming out of a dead she-wolf’s mouth did nothing to comfort her. The King didn’t need her; her position was almost a joke since he could protect himself. The only thing which had come out of her job had been feelings that would never be allowed between the head of the royal family and a commoner.

With her head still faced towards the floor and her internal battle to not cry anymore, Dawn didn’t hear Vaan rise to his feet before crossing the short distance to kneel at her side. Chewing down on the inside of her cheek, her eyes shut trying to scrap together the last of her dignity before she crumbled under the silence that had fallen over the office. Her body stiffened at the arms encircling her waist as her breathing shuddered to leave her lungs before getting a large breath of the king’s scent in her lungs. Her wolf howled at being so close to him, in his arms by his own free will. Color exploded across her cheeks as her body was pulled against his forcing her to feel him from the chest down to her belly. Her mind turned to mush at the muscles concealed under his shirt that had lead many to mistakenly believe Vaan was nothing but a wimp.

There was no warning, no chance for her to reply back before his lips were crushed against her own. Stilling under his touch, Dawn allowed herself to forget everything but his lips before her own moved to caress his in a way she’d only dreamed of. Getting lost in the moment, her hands reached up to drape around his shoulders to bring them even closer together. The tips of her fingers shyly brushed the strands of his hair, clearly unsure if it was ok to be so open with him. Breaking the kiss, her mind was back online needing to say something before they did something reckless. Or before she did something reckless. “Vaan, I haven’t the heart to act like I don’t love you anymore. So please, don’t offer something you can’t give.” The words were a whisper as she spoke them only inches from his lips so that she could stay in his arms for just a moment longer before he too realized this wasn’t going to work.

Timidly, so very out of character for Dawn, she took one hand and ran her fingers over Vaan’s cheek, over the slight stubble he had coming in, and down to his lips. If she could have died right then, she would have died happy for her wolf was purring at the touch of his warm skin under her fingers. Fingers that weren’t soft and smooth like a pampered princess but rough and worn from fighting for the king. At that thought, her hand stopped to fall down to her side, sadness washing over her eyes until her wolf even began to growl at the loss of his warm under her hand. “I’m sorry.”

[Vaan Niall]

How much times had Vaan dreamed of this moment? Too many to count upon both of his hands. It was a dream, too erotic and down right dirty to put into words but still the moment had arrived. It had not started the way he wished it had. He hated to see Dawn, the woman who held his heart in the palm of hand in such a state.

A woman in tears, especially when he had been the root of the problem was something Vaan could not deal with. It tugged at his heart strings, causing such waves of guilt to rush through him. His anger just melted away, leaving his eyes softening his entire face. Feeling her entire body stiffen in his arms, caused the King to rethink the situation. Was this too soon? Was this too sudden to act this affectionate.

The time to take this back had passed. Vaan had proved his love physical in this moment, kissing Dawn hard upon the lips. His brother wolf howled with such joy, happy to finally be holding her in his arms, feeling her lips against his own as he poured all the love within his heart into this one simple kiss. Her scent was intoxicating him, sending his mind whirling.

The moment her lips moved against his own, he swear he could almost cry. Vaan was beyond happy in this moment, more so than he had been in the last one hundred years. The only other times he had been filled to the brim with joy was the birth of his sons and granddaughters. Dawn returned his feelings, this kiss made what had been hidden so clear.

However as quickly as it had begun, it had ended the moment dawn pulled away. A small pop was heard as her lips broke away from his, ending the heated kiss. "Dawn, I love you and I wish I could offer you the world on a silver platter but the marriage law holds me back" He sadly explained, knowing that particular law stood in the way of his dreams and desires.

Resting his forehead against her own, he sighed deeply. What was he going to do? So much was stand before him, waiting to begin but something older than he was standing there, preventing his happiness.

Her touch, so slight but comforting broke his heart. Outside of this office they could not be so open and free with their affections for one another. They would have to return to being King and his captain and this was something that had to be. For a commoner to be the mate of the King was considered simply unacceptable, but hadn't Dawn proved herself already?

She was greater than most nobles that flocked to his court. She was courageous unlike others who would run at the first hint of danger. She had gain the respect of both his now adult children and held his heart. She was truly a diamond in the rough but was forbidden to love and hold. "No, never apologize Dawn" He told her, never wanting to hear those three words to escape her sweet, red ruby lips.

"I am the King and I can love whoever I desire. I love you Dawn Roseburn, it is you I want by my side night and say" He confessed to her, his voice deepened. The wolf was coming through, showing that they were agreed on this decision. Both sides of Vaan Niall wanted the woman he held in his arms.

An idea suddenly sparked within his mind. He was the King and could change an law that came before, amending the marriage law in order to be with the one he loved. A meeting with his counsel and chancellor was now necessary. Vaan would not wait until the end of the month oh no, he would send a messenger tomorrow to the heads of the five houses, summoning them back to his bosom, back to court.

Tomorrow was Tomorrow. Today he would focus on this blossoming relationship, for now it would be forbidden but not for much longer. A fire burned brightly within his heart, he would not stop until his future was certain, until his future with this glorious warrior woman was certain.

[Captain Dawn Roseburn]

Dawn leaned into Vaan taking comfort in his embrace, her fingers tightened at the back of his shirt as she struggled to not cry more than the few stray tears that had fall from her eyes. It felt weird to cry around someone, even Vaan who she cared about more than her own life. If anything, she hated feeling so weak and vulnerable around him. All she had ever wanted to be was his Captain, for the longest time she had been content with that arrangement. She couldn’t tell someone when in her mind that thought had changed from her being happy at his side in the shadow to wanting to be able to kiss him on the lips or touch his hand when he got that angry frown on his face. No matter the time, it had happened.

Naturally that wasn’t the only thing her mind had been set on doing to Vaan but she’d held those to herself, not even her sister knew those thoughts she reserved for herself. To her, Vaan was everything she couldn’t have but wanted with all her heart. He was stable, reliable, and a male that stood by his family when he wanted to shut himself away from the world. She couldn’t have him for one thing that shouldn’t have made a difference…he was king and no matter how hard she tried to improve her station there was no way to fix her place in life. She hated feeling like that, like she had no control over something in her own life.

The shock over Vaan’s rough kiss was slowly wearing off but her mind was taking awhile to catch up while her body was already happy to return the heated attention. Luna, she had only dreamed of kissing him like this. So freely. Her wolf growled possessively as if this moment cleared all the fog out of the tension that had settled between her and Vaan. But her human side was as in as much pleasure as pain. The kiss seemed to have only complicated things even more. It had been easy to convince her wolf to leave Vaan to his own business when she thought he didn’t give a damn about her, but the kiss made it clear that he did care about her. And if the amount of heat behind the kiss held any truth behind it, he cared A LOT. After this, her wolf would demand, crave, and need to be closer to him.

Finally, he’d said it and Dawn’s heart nearly burst out of her chest, her mouth dried while staring into his eyes. But his last few words forced her brain back into reality. “I don’t want the world on a silver platter but I fear what I want will never be possible.” Pressing her forehead back to his, she shut her eyes to take in his scent and allow it to wash over her senses giving her strength to maybe pull out of his embrace…later.

Try as hard as she might, she couldn’t hold back the tears that feel from her eyes at his declaration of love. “Damn you, Vaan.” Hiccupping, she trembled against him as she fought to control her own emotions that her wolf was whispering in her ear to give into. It would be far too easy to finally let free all her desires for the king, to simply give in to her wolf and her own heart for once. “Why did you have to say that?” What made this all worse was that she could see his wolf peeking through from his eyes and his voice to the point she was trembling but not in fear. Her own lust was building, growing stronger with each syllable that had dripped off his lips. “I love you. I’ve tried for so long to just stay in the shadow.”

Dawn knew she should pull away, knew she should runaway from Vaan’s side before she did anything else. But if he did love her, he’d grant her a moment to collect herself. Or at least a moment to hang on to him like a woman would to any man they truly love. She was going to need every ounce of courage to really work this relationship out. There was so many problems she doubted she’d ever be able to have a weak moment in public view. The only time she could allow her wolf to give in to relax was in these times with Vaan alone.

[Vaan Niall]

This moment had changed everything for the both of them. This was a new start, the first day of something more a true happiness for the both of them. Vaan could not wait to begin this chapter of his life with Dawn at his side, not just as his captain but also as his lady-love. Just having her in his arm was heaven even if this turned out to be nothing more than illusion. Was he simply dreaming?

The King could not tell but he did not want it to end.

Kissing her was unexplainable. Never before had he felt this way, just with her lips pressed against his in a simple touch. A brief kiss was showed so much, all he felt was being poured in this rather rough, heated kiss. Yes his station was above hers, this was not meant to be but he was the king after all. Vaan had the world in the palm of his hand, it was easy to change with a gesture of his hand. Laws were at his feet waiting to be approved or amended. Oh the power he truly wielded when he desired such things, even if they were forbidden much like their love was.

Everything was more complicated than it had been, had he not given into his emotions and kissed her, they would still be just Captain and King living in denial, causing pain to each other with every passing day, every missed moment of passion. Denial was something Vaan could not live with, it was not his friend but his bitter enemy.

His brother wolf was finally at peace with his more human side. Never before that there been such silence in his mind. This woman was the cause and answer to hours of angry debate between the two of sides of the same coin that was Vaan Niall. “Instead of the world, how about my heart and a pledge to remain faithful to you” He said, editing the wording of his promise.

“I have tried my hardest to not love you but I can’t fight it any longer Dawn. I want to step into the light with you” He spoke softly, holding her close in any embrace that only true lovers shared. “I truly love you Dawn Roseburn, Captain of my heart and I refuse to deny these feelings anymore” His words were filled with determination and love for this strong woman who had burst into his life, who had always been there through the worst and best moments of his life.

It was time for them, this was a love, purer than most. A love that had been brewing for the longest time but it was ready to take wing and enter this supernatural world they lived in. The question was whether the world was ready for such a love between King and Captain?

In time an answer would rise but Vaan would defend this decision until the end of his days.

[Vaan Niall]

CLOSED!